AP-Washington D.C.

After recent moves made by Wizards management, numerous riots and uproars have started outside the Verizon Center in Washington D.C. Numerous fans held picket signs and threw Chili dogs outside Verizon stadium as protest over latest “bum” trades as quoted by Wizard fans.

As you may or may not know, the Wizards have traded away fan favorite “Agent 0” and highly doubted draft pick in Nick Young. Received were younger players but fans particularly didn’t care for them. Many are interested in winning now rather than in a season or two.

“I don’t understand it.” Wizards fan John Togo stated. “We have a great team now, so why the hell are we trading it all away? Our management is just sending us into a world of misery and pain!”

From fan Dave Rages, a rioter outside the stadium: “We don’t want this trash! Give us the guys to win now! What next? We trade Jamison for more scrubs?”

Washington Wizards management was unavailable for comment, but a press secretary responded that management thought they were doing what we best for the team as a whole. Still though, many rioters still stand outside the stadium throwing chili dogs and cheese cake at the building in order to make a statement about their unhappiness. People wanted someone to blame and head coach Eddie Johnson turned about to me the victim.

Only a few hours after, rioters gathered outside of the Verizon center, management fired head coach Eddie Johnson in order to appease fans. All blame was thrown in his direction, and he let go with management citing “…bonehead decisions and idiotic liabilities…” Eddie Johnson was last seen in a high speed chase across the Canadian border.

Owner Dynodamon and GM Idon Care stated in a phone conversation to our paper that they are “…like deities…” and are “…without fault…” It has yet to be proven but fans seem to be happy with the changes made. Efforts are being made by fans to pull in some fan friendly players such as O.J. Simpson, Michael Vick, and Allen Iverson, though talks with the agents haven’t gone so well.

As for the next head coaching candidate, three particular coaches stand out above the rest. The first and favorite is former Kentucky Wildcats coach Adolph Rupp who had a stunning record at the college. Unfortunately though, efforts to contact the retired coach have been unsuccessful thus far. Second choice is 5th grade coach Bob McGoverie who coaches at a local Catholic grade school. He is said to have “…outstanding determination and effort”. He has been contacted and negotiations are in progress. Third choice is GM Dynodamon, but fans have vowed to jump off buildings if he was hired as coach. Also in the mix is former player Michael Jordan.

As the situation plays out in the next few days, the Washington Wazzu will be sure to keep everyone updated.

5/10 not much here and no pics

lol you have no sense of humor.

i know he's a terrible grader BOOOOO :D

this isnt a discussion thread